Sucks. I know that it is not a nice word to use. Anyway it is my real feeling at this moment.
My life which i always remind myself to plan wisely and according to my wish or what i wanted. It is now lost........
I am suppose to move. To a new and fresh environment. But why?why is it so unfair that i need to stay just to make sure peoples here have easy life and i still get nothing at the end? I don't feel it is right. Who cares bout my feeling? I am living so uneasy and insecure. It feels so lost.. I cant see the front road..I cant behave like what i usually do. I am not at my stage anymore. I am at people's backstage. Damn lame.
I feel damn sorry to annie- who has to go because of me without me. She wont be happy there when she is asked to do something she is not interested to. I know..i am sorry..God please showers her with more loves and blessings..give her my parts as well..
Neither me...I am not happy...My laughter gone..together with the rain..
God loves me i know. that is why i still have a light in this dark hall of life. He is my beloved one. Who cares bout me. Be there for me. Love me. I guess i will be worse if i am here without him. The only person i trust to. Thanks baby. Love u too.
having terrible homesick...especially this moment where i am LOST.......
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